Hi Tom, generally looking really good! - I have a couple of points though... firstly, you should have your name on the title page. Secondly, you seem to have 'lost' the introduction part both in the script and the storyboard....your audience is now back in the position where they are potentially unaware that they are looking at a human body. If you step away from the script and the background research, and just look at the storyboard as a thing in its own right, there are absolutely no clues to inform the audience what is going on! You have designed a little human figure icon, for a selection between heart, cell cycle etc...but he seems to have vanished! Also, I think it would be good to indicate on your storyboard what the text elements are going to be, again as a way of keeping your audience aware of which part in the cycle they are in.
Hey Tom - 11 pages? That seems a bit on the brief side to me... take a look again at your content and see which stones you've left unturned - also - you've got a very congested layout in places, as if you're cramming images together - go for something a bit more luxurious - certainly, you should consider presenting some final renders in a more 'stand alone' way - and personally, I also consider losing that very complex background image - because it's competing with the content - or, at least, further reducing its opacity so it's even more of a watermark.
Hi Tom, generally looking really good! - I have a couple of points though... firstly, you should have your name on the title page.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, you seem to have 'lost' the introduction part both in the script and the storyboard....your audience is now back in the position where they are potentially unaware that they are looking at a human body. If you step away from the script and the background research, and just look at the storyboard as a thing in its own right, there are absolutely no clues to inform the audience what is going on! You have designed a little human figure icon, for a selection between heart, cell cycle etc...but he seems to have vanished! Also, I think it would be good to indicate on your storyboard what the text elements are going to be, again as a way of keeping your audience aware of which part in the cycle they are in.
Hey Tom - 11 pages? That seems a bit on the brief side to me... take a look again at your content and see which stones you've left unturned - also - you've got a very congested layout in places, as if you're cramming images together - go for something a bit more luxurious - certainly, you should consider presenting some final renders in a more 'stand alone' way - and personally, I also consider losing that very complex background image - because it's competing with the content - or, at least, further reducing its opacity so it's even more of a watermark.
ReplyDelete