This is good. You've got good direction, but there is a large use of fade transitions. Also, with the constant change in scenery and owner, I suggest that, similar to that in "Rope", you focus the camera on the object, the puppet. Things can change around it, but the focus is always on the puppet. It's just that you have quite a number of characters, which may subtract from the attention of the puppet.
Puppet is created in 1850 by toy-maker. Girl buys puppet. Girl loses puppet.
Puppet is put into musem (when? 1900? 1950?) Puppet gets out, finds photograph of girl
New girl finds puppet and takes puppet to her father - a toymaker Toymaker is in same shop as 1850's shop - Toymaker is descendent of original toymaker? Final scene - new girl in bed with puppet. (circle closes).
Okay - well, this is very promising, Tom - but there are some things you must set-up to ensure the audience experiences the sense of the narrative circle closing and derives satisfaction from all those nice co-incidences. You'll need to think very carefully about your character designs, so that when we see the various photographs of the various characters, that there are enough distinctive features about them to ensure the audience reads those photographs effortlessly.
Time to draw up your animatic, Tom - and do so quickly and gesturally - a blue print to work out all those transitions.
This is good. You've got good direction, but there is a large use of fade transitions. Also, with the constant change in scenery and owner, I suggest that, similar to that in "Rope", you focus the camera on the object, the puppet. Things can change around it, but the focus is always on the puppet. It's just that you have quite a number of characters, which may subtract from the attention of the puppet.
ReplyDeleteHey Tom,
ReplyDeleteOkay - so just to be clear:
Puppet is created in 1850 by toy-maker.
Girl buys puppet.
Girl loses puppet.
Puppet is put into musem (when? 1900? 1950?)
Puppet gets out, finds photograph of girl
New girl finds puppet and takes puppet to her father - a toymaker
Toymaker is in same shop as 1850's shop - Toymaker is descendent of original toymaker?
Final scene - new girl in bed with puppet. (circle closes).
Okay - well, this is very promising, Tom - but there are some things you must set-up to ensure the audience experiences the sense of the narrative circle closing and derives satisfaction from all those nice co-incidences. You'll need to think very carefully about your character designs, so that when we see the various photographs of the various characters, that there are enough distinctive features about them to ensure the audience reads those photographs effortlessly.
Time to draw up your animatic, Tom - and do so quickly and gesturally - a blue print to work out all those transitions.